Family Law Lawyer-Mediator Zina B. Gleason, J.D. Offers Tips on Surviving Divorce During the Holidays

FULLERTON, CA--(Marketwire - October 27, 2009) - Southern California Family Law Mediator Zina B. Gleason, J.D., has some sound advice for couples going through divorce during the holidays: plan ahead to avoid some of the trauma and stress of divorce during these times. Gleason, who runs Redefining Divorce (www.redefiningdivorce.com), an organization developed to assist couples in amicable dissolutions, has issued some guidelines for couples that are recently divorced or going through the process during the holidays.

"The holidays are likely to elicit an array of feelings, so a bit of planning will help you and your children cope with your changing family structure and find some joy amid the rubble," said Gleason.

First, she says, focus on the children that are involved. "Do not let the children know that the holidays are difficult for you this year and you wish they would disappear. Create new traditions with your family. See if you can take the kids on the holiday(s) that are more important to you, and allow your former spouse to have the children on the important day of their choosing. If you cannot be with the people you traditionally have been with, do something different like take the kids on a day trip," Gleason suggests.

Gleason also advises strongly not to do or say things that will make children feel guilty about the holiday family situations created by the divorce. "Do not lay guilt on them by telling them you wish they were with you or next year you will make it better. These types of statements resonate in the children's minds and they internalize them, often resulting in negative repercussions."

Other tips for surviving the holiday-divorce process include spending holidays with supportive family members or friends, taking a trip to the mall to view the beautiful decorations, finding festive recipes online and creating them with your children, avoiding people that Gleason refers to as "downers" -- those that speak negatively about your ex-spouse, and seeking help from a family law mediator for guidance during the tumultuous times are all ways to survive divorce during the holidays. For more information call (714) 256-4689.